Pandemic Advice: If You’re A Baldie, Shave Your Head

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The COVID-19 pandemic continues to ravage our daily lives. When will we get sports back? When can we leave our houses? When will I get my next haircut? Speaking of haircuts this is a dark time for balding men.

Many follically challenged fellas will be facing the decision of whether to shave their head or not. I mean you could rock the Friar Tuck, but I’m not sure that’s going to get many ladies over to Quarantine & Chill. It’s time to come home boys.

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I have been bald for a minute now, so luckily for you, I have a few tips to make the transition more smooth (pun intended):

1.) Make Your Haters Elevators: Listen if you shave your head people will say things to you about it. They’ll make jokes about you not needing to worry about your head in the rain. If you’re overweight and bald, your friends and family will say you look like every overweight and bald guy they have ever met or seen on tv. It’s not great, I’ll be honest. However, you can’t let the haters win. Wear it loud, wear it proud fellas.

2.) Invest in Decent Razors: You can’t shave your head with a bad razor. Unless you enjoy your head bleeding like an outdoor spicket, invest in a razor at least of Gillette’s quality. You don’t need anything high falutin, just something in between Dollar Tree and Gillette. You will not regret this.

3.) Don’t Overwear Hats: If you’re bald, you’re bald. You can’t hide it with a hat. This is also your warning that when out in the sun make sure to lather up your dome, a hat is good combatant against the sun, however wear it too long and you’ll get a hat tan line worse Joe LaCava. I am habitual offender of this, and I can assure you it’s not a good look.

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4.) Shave Your Head Every Few Days: Some guys will tell you to shave your head everyday. This is not necessary. I would recommend shaving your head every couple days to avoid causing your scalp excess irritation. If you do it every 2-3 days you’ll be just fine, and just like a beard a little stubble can look good.

5.) Don’t Dry Shave: Much like when your shaving your face, heat and moisture help when shaving your head. Shaving before showering can yield some disastrous results. If you are skilled you can shave your head in the shower, I strongly advise against that. Don’t be an idiot, use a mirror.

Good luck out there my new bald friends. We are happy to have you on our team.

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